PCOS | Diet | Dairy

PCOS affects my day to day life more than I like to let on to the people that surround me everyday. But lately I have been noticing a change in my energy levels. Since finishing university and moving back in with my mom there have been more treats around me than there was before. There are cookies, chocolates, cakes and sweets all the time. My brother and sister are twelve and fifteen and like to eat the usual treats and rubbish that kids there age do. However, I am twenty-one and no longer a child and that means my needs for sugar aren't and shouldn't be matched with theirs. But the time of the month got to me when I first arrived back that first month and I ate a few too many sugary treats. Since then though I have been a bit of a sugar and snack addict up until a month ago when I managed to straighten myself out and get me back on a healthier road.

Growing up there wasn't a doctor to sit me down and properly  explain what PCOS was. That also included what you should eat and how people with the syndrome struggle with insulin resistance. I had to instead research on my own and find out about everything about it, and I still feel like I'm learning today. In fact I take my symptoms more serious now, than I ever have before. I'm learning more about my body and how certain and different foods make me react. That's both IBS and PCOS related. At the moment I'm figuring out what works for me and what doesn't. So far it is working and I am paying attention to how my body reacts to certain foods. There's still a long way to go and more I want to figure out, but so far so good.

Here is one of the main things I have recently learnt about PCOS:

~ Dairy - before my recent research I didn't know how bad Cow's milk and products are for your body. I knew that soy products were bad but I didn't realise that the milk contains IGF-1 or Insulin Growth Factor 1. IGF-1 is a naturally occurring hormone with a similar molecule structure as that of insulin, mimicking the role insulin plays. However, women with PCOS already have higher than normal levels of IGF-1, meaning that their ovaries are sensitive to heightened or added amounts of this hormone. This leads to their ovaries going into overdrive and doing more work than they in fact need to. I have now switched up my use of cow's milk and gone back to almond milk. It isn't a favourite but I am going to keep using it because I know how the switch has helped others internally, including helping the reproduction system and aiding natural unassisted periods.

Image

For more information I have found this website called pcosdietsupport.com. Tarryn suffers from PCOS herself and has also made podcasts which I have found useful that you can find on Itunes by searching pcos diet support.

Do you have PCOS? If so, have you learnt anything that you would like to share?

xChloex

16/08-22/08

This week has definitely had its highs and its lows in terms of weight loss. The lows happen when I feel like I am getting nowhere and the highs happen when I go to the gym and are able to do things I couldn't do even a few weeks ago. At the moment the bottom line is that I am nowhere near where I want to be. And honestly on my lowest days that fact still gets me down. I've been there, before, but not for long. But what keeps me going and pushing forth is that I am going to be there again, hopefully before or at graduation on the 27th of November.

There are big changes I am just failing to make. I am becoming conflicted and confused in my attempt to clean up my diet. There are too many things that I am trying to do at once. I am trying to eat Low Fodmap and Low GI all at the same time for health reasons. I am eating a Low Fodmap diet in order to help my IBS and so far so good. All my symptoms have calmed down and I am definitely happier as far as that part of my digestive system is concerned. The same is really to be said of the Low GI dietary changes I have been making, cutting down on high glycemic foods has been a huge change - mainly in my mood. So there are definitely improvements being made, just not at the fast pace I crave.

But I think that is mainly down to self and not giving it my all. There are nights out and I'm not one to turn down a beer, but I think that's where I need to stop. Only drinking for occasions or special events is definitely the way to go as my university days drift behind me. (It's getting less and less acceptable to drink on a Thursday haha.) But by abstaining from  alcohol, I know there will be rewards to be reaped on the scales.

Basically, I know what I need to be doing it's just putting mind over matter and getting the job done.

143.25

I was just going to boil the kettle for my morning coffee, when I became curious. And I am afraid curiosity got this cat! I haven't weighed in since this time last month, and I wanted to know. I didn't have any expectations...I just wanted to peek.

I mean who's ever happy to find out their weight has gone up, but it's just a number and I know myself that it will eventually come off through better eating and more moving about. Like I said in the previous post, my exercise has been better than my eating and I have actually been making an effort with that. Now all I need to do is rein in my eating and the scale may move down as a bonus to feeling amazing stomach-wise.

My doctor keeps pestering me to keep a food diary, but I am afraid it just doesn't work for me. I may remember for a day, but when those 24 hours are up I am hopeless and it gets lost under all the paperwork on my desk. So I think maybe a photo diary is the way to go and eventually write it down at the end of the day.

Source                                      

Such a Great Thing to Remember!

Do you have any tricks for when the scale goes up? What reassures you?

xoThanks for Readingxo

I'm Running on Dark Chocolate, Peanut Butter and Caffeine...

I love that quote.

Between working full-time this week and sleeping until 1 on my days off, I am wiped! I am running on dark chocolate, peanut butter and caffeine and it's not a pretty picture. I managed to get some chores done. I hung up my clean washing that's been sitting the washing bag for days. Disgusting I know. But I still haven't got around to changing my bed, hoovering my room and just having a general clean.

This week my priorities were to work my hours instead of finish my school assignments and on reflection that may have been a bad decision. But times of tight and some extra cash could help. So I have basically spent the past few days playing catch-up. That means the gym has been put on hold.

I managed to get a gym session in Friday and my upper chest is still quite sore. But that's all I've managed exercise wise this week. Like I said my priorities didn't match my previous goals this week. But I accommodated and didn't do too badly. My eating hasn't been super clean but I've been trying and it's a step in the right direction.

I have my goals for this week already written down in my diary, and they go as follows.

*Drink more fluids.

*Go to they gym 4 times (one of those may be changed to a walk, given my two assignment deadlines).

*Avoid eating after 7.30 pm.

Drinking more fluids seems to always be a goal of mine, but it works to remind myself how important it is.

I always want to get to the gym and once these deadlines are over things will be easier to make that a reality.

And finally not eating after a certain time has always been a good goal of mine. And when I get into the swing of things this is an easy one to maintain! It's all about exercising that willpower again. Like any other muscle I know it will get stronger with repetition.

Or Write About It...

xoThanks for Readingxo

New Year, New Me...?

Like I said in Mondays post for MIMM, I'm not one for New Year's Resolutions. When I was in Secondary School or High School, whichever you prefer, I was. But I haven't made them in years. Instead I find it more helpful to set them whenever I choose to. You can choose to be a new you every day you wake up. That's in your control and 24 hours doesn't change anything. 

But what I will write down is my goals for the month of January.

Three goals seems a reasonable number to start with...so here they are. Oh and these will more than likely be beginning when I get back to Cheltenham, as I am spending the next few days with my family.

To exercise five days out of seven.

and that doesn't necessarily mean get to the gym. That can be anything I want it to be. Maybe walks or a dvd or even strength exercises.

To drink as much fluids as I can; mainly water and squash.

And...finally

To eat a 80% fresh foods diet.

When the holidays are over some may find it hard to quickly convert, but if I am honest I am really craving an apple now! 

Can't wait for normality to begin and routines to revert back to normal. It really can't come sooner. I love to relax my diet and skip workouts in order to spend time with friends and family, but I am all ready for it to be over with.

The reason I'm not setting any weight goals yet, and this is just a personal choice, is because I am not going to weigh in. Maybe I will at the end of the month, or I might even leave it until the beginning of March. I can feel for myself when I am being healthy and doing everything I am supposed to be doing. And so I am not going to weigh-in knowing I will see a gain. Call it what you will. But for me this is the best way to proceed.

I am also thinking about trying out a challenge. My last challenge was back in October, and I attempted a squatting challenge. Can't remember how far I had gotten now, but I didn't fully complete it, which was a little disappointing.

Here are a few I am considering...courtesy of Pinterest!


Source


Source


Source



Any challenges that you are embarking on in the month of January?

Have you set your January goals yet?

xoThanks for Readingxo

Where Have I Been?

Well, I can completely confirm (loving the alliteration), that the semester has begun. It began three weeks ago, but first week is just reassuring us, the students, what's going to be happening on each Module. They usually last an hour and we are released. And then we move on to week two, and the realisation of what the semester will be about finally begins to sink in. Then we have the third week, and BAM.

Oh yes, those caps are definitely in order. I will list write now everything that is going through my head, and unusually there are many questions. It's like I have finally woken up and realised this year education will end and then what?!

The many questions floating around my mind...

*What do I want to do?
*When and what should I be applying for?
*Should I be applying for Jobs or Internships or Work Experience?
*Should I try and cram some work experience or an internship into this academic year?
*Do I just apply for retail and basic jobs?
*Do I apply for everything?
*What should my C.V look like?
*What should my cover letter look like?
*Should I apply for part-time jobs this semester (even though I am exceptionally busy!)?

I think you get the point right?

But with realisation brings productivity, which I am thankful for. Sometimes in the past under pressure I freeze up and then have to make rushed decisions towards the end - so it's nice to at least be planning a little ahead and sorting out my options.

Hopefully when it comes to the end of the academic year, I have a plan of what I want to do, my next move in life and where I want to live. That would be lovely. I have always been someone who likes to know where I am going, and that will probably never change! Direction is key to success. With me anyways. I've known this for years, since I began high school really. So, that's what I have been doing in regards to Academia and Work related things. If I am honest all it looks like I've been doing is panicking, but productive panic is always favoured over straight up panic, am I right?

If you've glanced at the right-side bar, you will have noticed that my weight has gone down. It's basically four of the pounds I gained over Summer with two more pounds to go! But it's nice to see them go nevertheless.

But I have also took the step into joining the gym. We looked around the all ladies gym last Friday, and then on Tuesday we had an induction and a mini-stair climber fitness test. It wasn't too bad, but I've been going everyday since Tuesday and it feels great! It's so good to be working out again. I am by no means a gym bunny, but I love the gym. I may not be the most athletic, or the slimmest or the most toned. But I absolutely love the strength I get from going to the gym, and it has also helped me sort out some of my stomach issues - just in the sense of my eating schedule and the certain foods I want to eat after a workout etc. I mean you don't have to be the brightest bulb to know that going to the gym is a positive thing, but in the past my anxiety has stopped me from doing such things and definitely a year ago I wouldn't have been able to do this and for that I am proud.

I joined with my best friend, only for a month as tester. I don't think that she's going to join again when our month runs out, but I am enjoying it and will make my decision in a months time. I just keep thinking of the amount of money, but then I weigh up the benefits and I think they are completely worth it.

Here's some Photographic Catch-Up:

Blueberry and Blackberry Smoothie.

Study Time.

Study Time some more.

Oh and more Study Time.

Tasty Left-Overs.

Home-Made Apple Crumble.

New Faux-Leather Jacket.

Porridge with Blackberries, Almonds and Nutella.

Greek Yoghurt, Almond Flakes, Blackberries and Banana.

Honey and Tea Time.

Anyway, that's me. Let me know what's been going on with you lately. Anything important or worth a mention (no matter how big or how small!)

xoThanks for Readingxo

Are You Accountable?

The overriding question on my mind this week has been; is it time I became accountable again?

It has been weeks since I weighed in; hopped on the scale and jotted down my weight. Not only on the blog for everyone to see, but also for myself. I have been 'avoiding' it for all the wrong reasons, and not by choice. And so it's time I hopped on the scale and saw for myself the number flashing back. 

I am not going to lie to anyone, including myself, and it's the truth when I say the number sometimes defines me - no matter how much I shy away from it. Admittedly, it isn't the best way to think or go about it, but it's one of the things that I struggle to resolve - no matter how hard I try. It's the thing that always sneaks back up to bite me!

It may be decades before my issues with the scale are resolved. It may never end. Who knows? All I can say is that I am always working on it, and it has always been part of 'my search for an healthier life'. Although it is ongoing, I try not to think too hard about it, or let it get me down too much - and I am so glad that is the attitude I have now towards the scale. Before, especially in my early teens, the scale would break me down every-single-Saturday ('weigh-in day'). I would work out like crazy the day before, take water tablets and barely eat, and that's definitely something I tend to shy away from these days.

But with all that said, and out in the open, sometimes it helps and reassures me. It shows me that I am healthy, and respect my body. And when I am not it goes up dramatically, or goes down dramatically - depending on what way I have chosen to punish my body. But lately I've not been too kind to my body, this time though its 'more normal', and it's because of my enjoyment of life. Instead of denying myself food and sitting alone at home, or indeed doing the complete opposite and bingeing (I hate that word by the way), it has been because I've started to put myself out there again. Which I just can't seem to see as a bad thing.

Because I think of where I was a year from now, and am grateful for how much has changed! I seriously am. And for that I am proud of myself, which I have struggled with all through my teens. So yes, I do want to take steps (not-so-drastic) and soon to improve my health, which I hope to achieve just by diet and moderate exercise alone. At the moment I am missing my 'feel good' feelings. You know the ones?! The ones that you get from a clean healthy diet and daily exercising. That energised feeling where you want and feel as though you can accomplish everything. Yep, I want that back. I had it when I left Chelt and I swear I had it up until last month - but I just keep reminding myself that it's by no means too long gone to get it back. That it in fact is never too late to get it back, end of.

I've been doing better this entire first week of September. I have limited the treats and kept a daily food diary. I've even been getting some daily exercise in. And it feels exactly as I knew it would and always has done - it feels great to be back on the right track!

Oh, and also thank you to you guys too. In times of crisis this little ol' blog keeps me going.

xoThanks for Readingxo

A Weighty Subject

As I am getting ready to go home for Summer I am struggling with all the things I want to get out of my Summer weight loss and fitness wise (improving). I haven't done a weight update in weeks, and when I weighed in this morning I saw 10.1 stone (and three quarters) flash before me. Which considering it's that time of the month and I haven't been eating my cleanest, it was amazing I lost anything at all let alone I didn't gain. So I've accepted the number on the scale for this week and I'm moving forward into a new week. Moving forward means last week has gone and is staying in the past. Where it should be.

But my thoughts this entire week have been going back and forth. How's Summer going to go? What about if it's not successful?  And all the rest of it. It's just pessimistic questions that I can't even answer for another few months, right? So, why am I letting them bother me?

This I have many answers for...

It's happened in the past. I've had high goals for summer, and I've actually ended up back peddling!

My outlook on life is to think about the worst thing that can happen first. Something that I've been improving on in recent months with the aid of therapy. It's a safety technique I developed in my early teens. That way whatever happens will be far better than previously imagined.

I have never trusted the process before. Something which I am getting better at.

The list could go on and on but you get the general idea. It's only until recently that my weight loss way of thinking has switched. When I was younger it was all about losing the most weight I could and being the skinniest I could. But I feel this year weight loss has taken a different turn mentally and physically, and it's time to put it into practice. To go for it and know if I fail I can always try again.







You get the idea.

Try, try again and if that doesn't work try some more. Journeys aren't meant to be a walk in the park. They are meant to challenge you, challenge your outlook  So, you come through the other side a better you, a you who you are proud of.

For me it's no longer about how much weight I can lose. It's about improving my fitness each day, each week and watching that side of me grow stronger. I want to be strong, not thin. I believe that that strength lies within me and that like any muscle in my body if I train and strengthen it it will grow. I was thinking about how much weight do I want to lose, and that's when I realised for me that although I want to maintain a certain weight, it's not the bee all and end all. That there's more to it. I'm 5ft7/5ft8 and I currently weight 10.1 (+0.75). And that number is fine with me. But to get the body I want I must maintain my current effort and then some. I need to exercise regularly, something that has made an appearance in my life every now and then  but never on a continuous basis. Something which I hope to have changed by the end of the year, but saying that I need to live in the now and focus on the coming week and stop worrying about the future.

I am still going to strive to make my diet as balanced with goodness as possible, but I don't want to become obsessed or annoyed if I have a "bad" day. Bad days are going to happen, but as long as the good outweigh the bad everything should balance out naturally.


I think this is what I'm aiming for and trying to say.



I'm finally doing it and "wanting" to do it the healthy way. It's took me months to lose 15 pounds so far but I want to make sure those pounds stay off. Like many I find maintenance harder than losing, which is why I am not trying to pay it too much attention. Or even refer to it as "maintenance". I'm just living the life I love, and that's enough for me.





Does anybody else struggle to "maintain"?

What's the part you struggle with the most when it comes to maintenance?

Have a great bank holiday weekend!

Limbo + Weigh-In

I feel like I am in limbo right now. Ever had that feeling? You're getting stuff done but going nowhere all in the same moment/movement?! Well that's what I feel like right now. I have always felt that spring/easter break has always came at the right and wrong time. Right time because I am exhausted but wrong time because my momentum for studying is always on a high before break. And then after break BAM, where'd the momentum go?

I can feel it slowly returning to me, just wish it would get its jog on!

Moving on...
I haven't weighed in in 4 weeks now and I am unhappy that I've gained 3.75 pounds but at the same time I am just accepting that number and moving on to the next week, where I am hoping to lose at least 1.75 of those pounds. I don't know why but I hate .75's they drive me crazy! So, this week I am going to focus on tracking my calories in, and trying to get some small workouts in just for some movement. Which is going to be hard over the next 6 weeks because it is the end of semester 3 soon, which means the year is coming to a close and things around here are becoming stressful, with deadlines every week and end of year classes coming to a close.

I kind of feel like I suddenly don't have enough time to get done what I want to get done, but I need to remind myself to take it one step at a time and tick off one thing on my list at a time. No matter how long that list feels. It's all about prioritising for me these next few weeks, not balance which is what I normally strive for. My goal is to prioritise things on my list and get them done. I need to realise that end of term also means Summer is coming. I really hope it brings the weather with it! But Summer is coming and so there will be plenty of free time shortly, and in that a few months time I will be no doubt moaning about I miss a hectic schedule and my usual Uni routine!

I have seven weigh-ins before I return home and I am going to make every single one count, no matter how hectic things seem at the moment. I am aiming for at least a pound in weight loss every week, but I'd like 1.5 pounds if I am honest.

With exercise it's going to be about getting in small workouts until this stressful period is over on the 14th of May. I will try and share what I am doing as far as workouts go here on my blog. And obviously I will be showing a snapshot of my food on WIAW =D

I have found a few good workouts that I want to try, and that I'll be sharing in a post soon. I will probably start the squatting challenge tomorrow!

Happy Friday =D

Weigh-In Update

So, I have been thinking what to write all day at work. That is in between the time I actually got to think today. Work was busy! But in a good way :D

Anyways, this morning I got on the scale I am a little more swollen than last week, and my eating and working out have taken a back-seat. Not entirely but it has definitely been affected this week. It's a new week right?

I did lose weight this week. Only half a pound. But then I say that and it sounds soo negative right? "Only" just shouldn't be in front of that. I guess a loss is better than a gain and before hand I told myself a loss or the same would do me fine. But then I saw the number and it left me conflicted, and it didn't sit well with me. I should be jumping for joy. A loss is a loss and it's all going towards something, something great, and I feel great. I am now 142 (10 st 2). But then I thought how am I going to feel seeing that 13 in front of the last digit, and you know what? Will it really make me feel that different? And I don't think it will. I mean it has in the past, but always in the end the number means nothing to me. In a way anyways, yes at the moment the number holds some importance. But I have realised when I feel great, that's what really counts. The flat stomach, the energy, that FEELING!

We all know that feeling, and at times I live for that :D

So I am going into this week with a clear head, it's a new entirely different week that we can never get back and I am going to make the most of it. That's MY decision. I want to feel great and I deserve to. So bring it on :D

I will be doing a post about my set-up for the week on Sunday. Have a great weekend! Just remember this for now.

Weigh-In Update

So, my massive (to me) weight loss wasn't exactly a shock this morning. I have really been suffering with my stomach lately (as previously mentioned), and I can't wait to go to the doctors again for my blood test results. I am hoping something shows up because at least it would give me an explanation of why I am in so much pain.

Anyways, this week I lost 3.25 lbs, which is a lot for me. Don't know how this will effect my weight loss next week. I am way more wary of losing weight quick this time because I want so badly to keep it off, but again that all depends on me and I have realised now that I have that power and control! I think my weight loss is by no means too much. Since September I have lost 15 lbs, with 11 pounds coming from this semester alone. But when you average it out it's less than 1.5lbs a week which is within the normal range, and I guess as I get closer to target (9st 7lbs) losing weight will become harder and slower. Or not, you never know! But I am definitely focusing more on how I feel this time, and I love feeling like this :D

My goal for March was to get under 10 stone (140lbs) and I am now more confident that that goal is attainable. But we will see there's still over 3 weeks of March left and I am home at the end of the month so I feel as though it would be good to make a plan of action.

Another issue I will probably face is weighing myself in another room, on another floor, but with the same scale. Does anyone else like weighing in on the same scale, in the same room, on the same floor, at the same day and time? Well, that will be taken away from me for two weeks. I want and need to be accountable to me by still weighing in but I also am a little nervous and wary about how much those factors will affect my weight.

I am trying to stay positive and move on into a new week :D Enjoy the weekend.

Weigh-In Update

I made it! In fact I surpassed it. To tell you the truth I thought I had gained. I know I am such a pessimistic person. I am down 1.5lbs. Which means I surpassed February's goal to get past 147 lbs. I am still contemplating my weight loss goal for March as I write this post. And I think I know the barriers that are in my way. It's basically me. I am in my own way as per usual. This is always the way for me. I am either my own best friend or my own worst enemy.

When I get back home there are things I will do differently, like I have mentioned before in recent posts, and I need to remember going home doesn't mean weight gain, bad habits and laziness. I just need to take everyday as it comes and become balanced. It will be the same this summer when I go home, although it feels like ages away, it will come along before we know it. And then it will be Christmas again, though let's not get that ahead of ourselves.

I think I should say a number and do what I can to achieve that number. Think positive, and if I fail then I will cross that bridge when I come to it. For now I am going for it!

So, my next mini-goal is obviously to get under 140lbs but if I don't make it this month then that will be ok too, as long as I get close enough to smash it next month. I  want this weight to come off and stay off, after all.

So, I guess I am saying 5.75lbs. Yeah that's how much I want to lose :D There you have it.

Weigh-In Update #2

I was pleasantly surprised when I stepped on the scales quickly this morning before heading out quite early for a Friday (for me anyways). It I was down another 1.25lbs. Score! because I honestly didn't think with what week it was I'd be down any, I had actually prepared myself mentally for a gain.

I use Livestrong and so at the beginning of the week I moved my calorie goal from - losing 1 lb to 1.5 lbs as I'd gone over repeatedly over the weekend, and that wasn't even including the alcohol I had drunk. (A lot of wine - so not the most diet friendly alcohol drink).

This week I am working towards ending February on a positive note, as my goal was to be under 147lbs and that means I have 0.25lbs to go! Need to make this goal. Can't wait to be under 147! I haven't decided what my goal for March will be yet. Hmm I have time to ponder it I guess. I'll return on Sunday with my goal. But I go home late March for a couple of weeks, and for some reason I feel slightly out of control when I am at home, or I should say less in control. Here at Uni I am in control of everything, especially food. And if I don't buy it, I don't eat it! Simple as. Now at home it's not practical to do that, because my mom has to buy items I normally wouldn't for my younger siblings. But I have to remember I am in control in all situations, and I am the one making the choices and decisions whether to eat something or not and it is the same with exercise. It's on me and only I can decide.

Well... this has turned into a way more in depth post than I started with. I just wanted to do my usual Friday weigh-In check in.

And on that note... Enjoy your weekend everyone.

I am spending mine working and trying not to get sick!

Comparisons. Healthy or not?

Brittany over at gothextramile did a post about Comparisons, in particular comparing ourselves to others. I am guilty of this too and it happens often. I guess it's normal for us as humans to compare ourselves to each other all the time. I am not saying it's healthy, just normal. But this behaviour can be destructive, especially to your self-esteem.

I always try to treat myself how I treat others and how I want them to treat me. Sure I slip-up sometimes. But, who doesn't? These lessons are there to be learned from, and they are serious lessons in life.

You can either judge and compare yourself with others, or you can see yourself separate from everyone else. One person can't be compared to/with the next  We all come from different backgrounds, different places and it isn't fair to judge yourself using somebody else's template.

It's great that we are all different. We can learn from each other, and add to our own personality, rather than adapt ourselves to fit somebody else's image. That's a big part of why I decided to stop buying cheap, celeb gossip magazines. It wasn't healthy for me to even flick through them. Now if I am going to invest my money in magazines I buy Running or Fitness magazines. Magazines that I can learn healthy habits from, magazines that aren't going to put me down and make me feel inadequate.

Here are some reminders, some positive thoughts to remember today and beyond. It's good to refer back to them at times where you are feeling low.

Stop comparing yourself to others. You are the only one, there's not another you.

Weigh-In Update

This week has been rough emotionally to say the least. I got caught up in low moods and feeling sorry for myself. Well it's a new week and I get a new chance to try it all over again.

My Weight this week stabilised at 148.5, so no change from last week. I am glad I maintained and didn't gain after the amount of Nutella I consumed this week, not to mention double pancakes. 

I've also only worked out this week once, which seems like a waste as I'm still on Paris countdown. But I guess I should just use it as a lesson not a week wasted. This week I want to make up for it. I know I'm capable it's just getting around to doing it. I need a plan for my week starting today.

So, this is what I've come up with! To be changed according to my work and Uni schedule.

                

Sat 16/02 - Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred

               - 10 Minutes Strength Arms, Back and Shoulders (Before dvd).

Sun 17/02 - Run outside w/ My Best Friend.

Mon 18/02 - Jillian Michaels DvD (To be decided)

                  - Check out swimming at our local lesiure centre.

Tues 19/02 - 10 Minutes Strength Arms, Back, Shoulders.

                   - 10 Minutes Strength Legs, Butt, Calfs.

                   - 5 Minutes Abs Strength.

Weds 20/02 - Jillian Michaels DvD (To be decided).

Thurs 21/02 - Repeat Tuesday (Similar)
                    - Yoga.

It's just a template, but it is more likely to get done if I ink it in so to speak. Lately I've been so tired in general that I've had no motivation to anything but Uni work and vegetate. This is weird to say my sleeping pattern is just getting good again, not too much and not too little. Hope I have just jinxed it (cus you know I'm 5 and still believe in jinxes).

My goal for this week is to lose 1.5 lbs that would mean I would have already made my goal for February. Anyways, I am hoping to have a productive and relaxed weekend.

Enjoy your weekend :D I know I will!

P.S - I think I'm finally coming out of my funk. Thank you know what xoxo

A Weighty Subject

So, this week I am down 4.25 lbs. Granted most of it was probably water weight from that time of the month, but this week I feel as though I have hit a turning point. Though this point is small it opens up doors I thought had been closed off. I haven't been this weight since the beginning of last summer. Since then I've hovered in the early 150's, which I wasn't always happy with to say the least.

I feel like I am getting my life back which is sad but true, and my weight's a big part of that. If I'm happy or maybe a better word would be content (with life). I'm lighter both mentally and physically and it's just part of a much bigger package.

This week as you can see from my posts I'm beginning to get back into the swing of things when it comes to working out. Day 1 was definitely the hardest, but as I get that mental strength back the physical strength is just there regardless. I want to keep it going and I am just 1.5 lbs away from this months goal, so hopefully I can make that and then surpass it.

One of my goals for this month was to start tracking again on LiveStrong.Last year it was my most valuable tool, but after a while it also became boring and monotonous and so I ended up giving it up. But as soon as I tracked the first couple of days I realised where I was going wrong and it so I was able to resolve these little issues without much of a problem.

It's all about learning what works for me again and retraining my mind and body to remember these good/healthy habits I'm acquiring again.

These are the things keeping me going this week:

Love this film, but it's also a great saying.

Need this top! And it is always a good reminder why I'm doing what I'm doing.

We all have those bad days but it's a nice reminder that although you're having a bad day, it doesn't mean it's a bad  life.

So true! Sometimes I forget that and get caught up in society's thoughts and images etc.

Need to remember this when I'm lifting weights. To push through because I want to be a BEAST.

I need to remember this. It's life to eat and indulge in both good and bad things. But you need to let the good outweigh the bad. Though the bad doesn't ruin all the good, as long as the bad is consumed in moderation.

I need to remember this when certain peoples comments or actions get to me.

It's Just Weight Right?

Lately the scale doesn't seem to be shifting. Now, logically I know why that is. I need to eat better, get my fruit and veggies in and I need to begin consistently working out again. The truth is I guess I'm scared to fail. I've been all weights and sizes, and most of them have been unhealthy. I don't eat so too low. I overeat I go back up to a healthy yet high weight for my height and I don't feel good. And that's why I'm making a good go at this blog. I want to have accountability. I want to have balance.

So at the moment the scales hovering around 149.5-150.25. I know not a big fluctuation considering what the time of the month it is. But it still gets me down and makes me disappointed with my food choices and lack of exercise choices. I mean when I am at Uni I'm walking everywhere. To class, into town to get my shopping. I don't generally stop, but I think I need to start making a better go at things.

When I found this on Pinterest this morning after I'd weighed in, it really resonated with me. Because up until I had weighed in I was doing and feeling fine. So why the change?

Speaking of exercise, when I'm working out it's fine. I'd go as far as saying I enjoy it. I enjoy the sweat and the achiness of the different muscles the day after. But for me it's consistency and the determination to get going that's difficult for me. But I think it could only be for the best to get moving and start going.

I'm excited to go. But at the moment not so excited about getting my bare legs out!

I'm going to Paris in June with my best friend and like I mentioned at the bottom of the previous post I'd like to lose 15/20 lbs before I go. But making sure I do it the healthy way, eating fresher more natural foods and exercising on a regular basis. I used to love exercising when I was younger but that's before it became an obsession to purposely walk everywhere even if people offered me a lift or to lift weights even though I'd barely eaten all day. The things that made these choices unhealthy were my mentality. The actual things I were doing would have been fine if my diet and thoughts were healthy but they weren't. And it's something that's haunted me for years.

Hopefully over the weeks leading up to Paris I can deal with some of these issues through balance of diet and exercise.

As my blog title reads I'm just a girl Searching For A Healthier Life.

Body Image Real or Not Real?

I've been struggling with body image again in the last week more than usual. I mean it's not unusual. I normally always have body image struggles and hang ups, whether I'm getting ready for a night out or just going to class. But it get's worse the more healthier I try to be - if that makes sense? Well for me it's always been that way anyways. Even since my early teens, maybe even before that who knows! Well lately I can feel the anxiety building when I have to put on clothes and go some where, or even just taking a shower triggers the same feelings. Anyway I'm trying to solve the issue and make it easier to live with right now. And I've been thinking exercise in whatever form is the way to go- build it up little by little and regain my strength slowly. So I'm going to work on consciously adding that in, starting small like I said.

Hopefully it helps, and I regain some control back over my negative thoughts.