09/08-15/08

This week equals a success and I feel completely proud of myself to be saying that sentence.

As I relax now with a well earned beer (or two), I find myself looking back on the week. The lows, the highs, the successes, the failures, it really did all happen. But I battled with myself when it came to food and I made sure that I got a good workout session in (whatever I decided it would be). And two out of three ain't bad, as Meatloaf would say or for me six out of seven ain't bad! The only day I "took off" was Thursday, or yesterday I should say, as I just felt downright terrible after minimal sleep. At one point, I honestly thought I'd pass out from exhaustion. But I powered through, took two Pro-Plus (which I hate to do) and pulled it out of the bag. Now I never recommend taking caffeine in pill form, but yesterday it was necessary and quickly did the trick. I'd say within half an hour I was powering through job applications and continuing on with my Thursday.

Eating healthy and cleaner, and simply working out, doing whatever I chose is what has made my week a success. In my own eyes anyhow. The workouts where beginner and nothing too strenuous was achieved, as in I wasn't flipping tyres or throwing sandbags, which is what I always think about when I think of "proper people" who work out. I ran, I lifted weights, I toyed around with kettle-bells (easily my new favourite piece of gym equipment). Nothing was ever boring, though at times it was hard and I think that's where balance comes into the equation. You need to enjoy what you're doing, but it needs to feel challenging enough to see improvements and changes. These improvements and changes are what make you want to continue and to power through. They are evidence of your hard work and proof of the strength you put into each session. So hopefully 4 to 6 weeks time and I'll see some kind of improvements.

I'm not weighing myself at the moment,a deliberate decision that I have made. It will do no good and so I am going to leave it alone...for now anyways. My goal weight I feel is always 9 and a half stone, with a 25/26 inch waist. Those are the figures I always have in my mind, because I know when I get down to that weight all the opportunities I'll have. Opportunities like wearing shorts and not minding, just the little things like that that make life that little bit easier.

And that's where I leave it for today. Hopefully next week will be just as successful.

xoChloexo

Everyone Has To Start Somewhere

I heard this saying the other day. I can't remember in exactly what context it was said, but it was something that definitely resonated with me.

And it is true, 'We do all have to start somewhere...'. Where that may be is upto us. We are the ones who have that control.

Source

Sometimes it may feel as though it is slipping out of our hands, but stop, breathe, and take another look. You still have the reins in your hand, you are still in control.

But that's something I had certainly forgot up until this week. When I truly remember it, it tends to stick around for a long time. And I remembered the other day just how long I have made it. I made it a total of nine moths before crashing out, and that's not bad at all, is it? I don't think so, and in fact that's one of my best attempts. But then I remembered something, the things that got me through I had lost. I had stopped working out and I no longer had the faith and confidence. And these things are vital for how I got to where I am today.



So, here's to the next stint. Let's hope it lasts as long as the last. And if you are thinking of giving up, remember, 'Everyone has to start somewhere' and make that day today. Go on, you know you want to...I know I do.

It's not about where you are right now, or where you've been for however long, that's just temporary or in the past. It is about where you are going, and that's up to you.

When's your best place to start again? Or to move on...

xo Chloe xo

Time For A Change

And whilst I am writing this post I am singing 'Changes by Ozzy Osbourne and Kelly Osbourne' in my head. Catchy. Anyways like the title says, I am feeling a change coming on. Nothing too dramatic for this blog, it's just the title of the blog really that I am keen to change! I picked the title for this blog a year and a half ago now, and a lot as changed. I only really started using this blog as a writing outlet at the beginning of the year, and as I have got more and more into it things that I used to like no longer serve the purpose they had. This includes the title!

It's also time for an added change. I find myself lately wanting to write posts that wouldn't necessarily go with the theme of this blog. Yes, this blog is all about my life, but it's mainly about; Health, Food, Cooking, Baking, Fitness, Exercise and what not. And that's the category they fall into, because that's the sort of things I started off writing about and I still love to write about! But I find myself wanting to write a post about the new shoes that I brought, or the new make-up that I have been trying out, and although I guess I could integrate those kind of posts into this blog I have made a clear decision to start a second blog where I can write about all of that. Don't know when that will be up and running yet, and I have probably picked the worst time of year to make that decision (it being the beginning of the school year and everything!) But it's what I want to do and are determined to do and so there you have it.

I have also decided that I want to have a crack at making YouTube videos that will all be linked to both blogs in content. I am excited by these up and coming personal projects, and I just hope I haven't overloaded myself too much!

This blog has been a massive help to my anxiety, and my road to recovery if you will. When I started CBT at the beginning of the year, I wouldn't have guessed where the next nine months would take me and I wouldn't have guessed this is where I would be. And I definitely wouldn't have guessed that my head would be in such a good place.

Sure I still suffer from anxiety, and in particular social anxiety. Maybe that fact will never change, but the difference is that I now have a hold on the situation, and have all the tools to help manage my problems. And you guys have no idea how much this blog and your views and comments help me to overcome that. 

Here's to change. Hope you all are well!

And...

xoThanks for Readingxo

Have you ever had any type of therapy for whatever reason, and what are the things you do to cope with your problems?

How many blogs do you have? and Do you write about different things on each, or stick to one where you talk about all things?

Anyone else suffer from Social Anxiety? How do you cope?

Let me know, I would really love your feedback on the subject!

Paris...

A City of My Dreams and now My Reality.

Well, it has been a dream of mine to go since I was younger and this year was the year I made that dream a reality. I love making dreams in general a reality, but dreams where travel is concerned is even better. I love to travel, to see the world and soak up every drop of culture a city, town or country can spare. When I do this I treasure it and a little grin forms across my face, sometimes even taking a photograph or two to commemorate the moment. A moment I will treasure in years to come. I love photos and although I am a writer I still truly believe that a photo can say much more than a sentence or any number of words can ever. And that's why I have quite a lot of photos to share with you :-D

Night Time view from Hotel Balcony.

???

Really France, The "Very Bad Trip 3"? We took that to mean the previous two had been called the same thing!

Luxemborg Gardens.

For some reason I really loved this statue. I think it was it's thinking pose/stance.

Pantheon.

Inside the Pantheon.

Inside the Pantheon.

At the top of the Pantheon looking down.

Eiffel Tower = Pure Madness.

Second Level of Eiffel Tower.

We went right up to the Summit, we thought why not whilst we are here.

Finally at the bottom again.

Our journey to the top and at the top of the Eiffel tower is  a whole story in itself. But I'll word save by saying that a man tried to jump while we were at the very top and so the fire brigade were called along with the police, and every other imaginable emergency service. It took us an hour to get down because every security measure was being taken, and we had to be brave soldiers and walk half of the way back down. That was an experience just in itself let me tell you!

Pont de l'Archeveche = "Love Lock Bridge"/ "Lover's Bridge".

Trust me Google it. It was one of the most romantic things I had ever seen. I just wish I had spent more time walking across it. But let me tell you, it isn't for the faint hearted and the view definitely isn't always picturesque. As I was about to step onto the bridge, Alex kindly brought my attention to the rat (who was missing half of its tale by the way) scurrying its way to the other side in front of me. Now I'm not majorly screamish when it comes to rats, but I still wouldn't have appreciated it crawling across my feet!

Arc de Triomphe.

Cemetery.

Sounds quite creepy when we say "we went to a cemetery" whilst we were there in Paris. But let me explain... it came by recommendation of our travel agent lady, and it was the famous cemetery called "Pere Lachaise". This cemetery is beautiful first of all, but there are lots of influential and well known people buried there and it also has a lovely story behind its existence. So, if you ever go to Paris I recommend you visit there.

Expensive Alcohol.

Paris definitely need to lower their alcohol prices. I nearly fainted. Definitely didn't leave any!

Inside Pantheon.

Notre Dame Cathedral.

Looking back on all of the hundreds of photos me and Alex took that week in Paris, it makes me sad and longing, yet a sense of accomplishment overrides the previous emotions to conquer through. A year ago I could barely leave the house, and so for overcoming things I wouldn't have even dreamt about last year I am extremely proud of. And I am also extremely proud of being courageous enough to share it with you guys.

xo Thanks for reading folks xo

Have you guys ever been to Paris?

Anywhere in particular you want to go, or have plans to visit?

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